Berapa Lama Waktu yang Kita Perlukan untuk Jatuh Cinta? (2024)

Kompas.com - 15/08/2022, 09:51 WIB

Sekar Langit Nariswari

Penulis

Berapa Lama Waktu yang Kita Perlukan untuk Jatuh Cinta? (1)

Lihat Foto

ilustrasi jatuh cinta.(PEXELS/Rodrigo Souza )

KOMPAS.com - Beberapa orang butuh waktu lama untuk jatuh cinta namun ada juga yang mudah terpikat.

Perbedaan ini membuat kita kadangkala perlu menjalani masa pendekatan yang cukup lama sebelum yakin menjalin hubungan dengan seseorang.

Namun ada juga yang namanya cinta pada pandangan pertama atau langsung naksir seseorang setelah kencan perdana.

Baca juga: Jatuh Cinta Bisa Picu Munculnya Jerawat, Mitos atau Fakta?

Janet Brito, PhD, psikolog klinis dan terapis seks asal Hawaii mengatakan jatuh cinta berbeda pada setiap orang.

“Itu semua tergantung pada individu, keadaan, dan lingkungan tempat mereka berada,” jelasnya, dikutip dari Cosmopolitan.

Berapa lama waktu yang diperlukan untuk jatuh cinta?

"Jatuh cinta adalah proses memahami dan mencintai seluruh nilai, filosofi, sejarah, tantangan, dan keeksentrikan manusia,” jelas Jenni Skyler, PhD, terapis seks asal Kanada.

Perasaan ini bisa saja intens dan berlebihan namun juga merupakan proses merasakan kedekatan dan penerimaan dari seluruh keberadaan seseorang.

Penelitia tahun 2011 membuktikan pria membutuhkan waktu sekitar 97 hari untuk benar-benar merasa jatuh cinta dan mantap menjalin hubungan.

Riset yang dimuat di Journal of Personality and Social Psychology itu menambahkan, para wanita perlu waktu yang lebih lama sekitar 149 hari untuk merasakan hal yang sama.

Baca juga: Kutukan Romansa Pemeran Spider-Man, Sempat Dilarang Jatuh Cinta

Dalam hubungan heteroseksual, meskipun mereka mungkin tidak mengungkapkannya secara verbal, penelitian menunjukkan bahwa pria cenderung jatuh cinta lebih cepat daripada wanita,

Hal ini berdasarka sebuah studi tahun 2010 yang diterbitkan dalam jurnal Evolutionary Psychology.

Namun beberapa penelitian juga masih banyak yang bertentangan dengan hal ini.

"Para ahli terus menegaskan bahwa berapa lama waktu yang dibutuhkan untuk jatuh cinta berbeda untuk setiap orang," jelas Brito.

Mengapa ada orang yang mudah jatuh cinta?

Berapa Lama Waktu yang Kita Perlukan untuk Jatuh Cinta? (5)Freepik Ilustrasi pasangan suami istri berciuman

Terlepas dari penelitian yang ada, ada segelintir orang yang begitu mudahnya jatuh cinta.

Hal ini tak lain dipengaruhi oleh beberapa faktor, misalnya:

Gaya keterikatan kita

"Orang dengan gaya keterikatan yang cemas bisa jatuh cinta dengan sangat mudah," kata Skyler.

Alasannya, mereka merasa seperti membutuhkan pasangan untuk merasa nyaman sehingga lebih terbuka untuk jatuh cinta dan menjalin hubungan daripada kebanyakan orang.

Baca juga: Apakah Kita Benar-benar Jatuh Cinta? Kenali Tandanya

Sebaliknya, orang dengan gaya keterikatan penghindar cenderung menghindari perasaan sensitif, emosi, kata Skyler.

“Mereka memiliki sebuah blok, sebuah tembok di atas. Mereka masih bisa jatuh cinta, hanya tidak segera atau secepat itu,” jelasnya.

Riwayat hubungan seksual

Jatuh cinta juga bisa dipengaruhi faktor apakah kita sudah pernah berhubungan seksual dengan orang tersebut atau belum.

Terlepas gaya hidup kita, mencampurkan hubungan intim dalam hubungan yang belum jelas membuat kita lebih mudah terikat.

"Membawa hubungan seksual ke dalam campuran dapat membuat Anda menangkap perasaan seseorang lebih cepat, karena menambahkan lapisan keintiman ke dalam persamaan yang dapat membawa Anda lebih dekat ke cinta," kata Skyler.

Baca juga: 6 Kebiasaan yang Membuat Hubungan Seksual Makin Memuaskan

Mengingatkan kita pada orangtua

“Biasanya kita jatuh cinta dengan cepat ketika seseorang secara tidak sadar mengingatkan kita pada orang tua kita,” kata Skyler.

Alasannya, orang tersebut tampak akrab dan aman sehingga kita merasa lebih dekat dengannya daripada yang sebenarnya sehingga muncul perasaan jatuh cinta.

Baca juga: Ketahui, 4 Efek Samping Jatuh Cinta pada Tubuh

Simak breaking news dan berita pilihan kami langsung di ponselmu. Pilih saluran andalanmu akses berita Kompas.com WhatsApp Channel : https://www.whatsapp.com/channel/0029VaFPbedBPzjZrk13HO3D. Pastikan kamu sudah install aplikasi WhatsApp ya.

Tag

  • perasaan
  • jatuh cinta
  • hubungan
  • cinta
  • pasangan
Lihat Lifestyle Selengkapnya
Lihat Parapuan Selengkapnya

Video rekomendasi

Video lainnya

Pilihan Untukmu

`); var wSpecStop = createElementFromHTML(`

Konten disembunyikan.
Muat ulang halaman untuk perbarui rekomendasi.

`); reactionPopup.querySelector('.buttonShare').setAttribute('data-title', item.title); reactionPopup.querySelector('.buttonShare').setAttribute('data-url', itemUrl); reactionPopup.querySelector('.buttonShare').setAttribute('data-campaign', 'AIML_Widget_Desktop'); let userFeedback = new UserFeedback(resultObj.engine['tracker_algsrc'], itemUrl + tracker_params, jxRecHelper, index); reactionPopup.querySelector('.buttonBookmark').addEventListener('click', function() { do_bookmark(itemUrl, index, userFeedback); }); reactionPopup.querySelector('.buttonShare').addEventListener('click', function() { userFeedback.event('share'); }); reactionPopup.querySelector('.buttonNotInterest').addEventListener('click', function() { if (getCookie('kmps_usrid')) { hideThisArt(this); userFeedback.event('not-interested'); } else { const parentAction = this.parentElement.parentElement.parentElement if (!!parentAction) { let indexElement = parentAction.getAttribute('data-index') if (indexElement != 'undefined') { localStorage.setItem('reaction_not_interest_temp', JSON.stringify({ urlpage: items[indexElement].url })) } } window.location.href = "https://account.kompas.com/login/a29tcGFz/" + btoa(window.location.href); } }); /** * trigger action "userFeedback" that user not interest item before, when not interest without login */ if (getCookie('kmps_usrid') && localStorage.getItem('reaction_not_interest_temp')) { const tempUrlNotInterest = JSON.parse(localStorage.getItem('reaction_not_interest_temp')) if (itemUrl == tempUrlNotInterest.urlpage) { userFeedback.event('not-interested'); localStorage.removeItem('reaction_not_interest_temp'); } } wSpecStop.querySelector('.wSpec-stop-undo').addEventListener('click', function() { showThisArt(this); userFeedback.event('un-not-interested'); }); recItem.appendChild(buttonOption); recItem.appendChild(reactionPopup); recItem.appendChild(wSpecStop); } var recItemWrapperA = createElement('a', null, null, null); recItemWrapperA.setAttribute('href', itemUrl + tracker_params); var titleDiv = createElement('h4', null, null, [cssClasses.title]); var titleTextNode = document.createTextNode(item.title); if (item.itemType == 'video') { var iconVideo = createElement('div', null, null, ['icoInline', 'icoVideo']); iconVideo.style.marginRight = '5px'; titleDiv.appendChild(iconVideo); } titleDiv.appendChild(titleTextNode); var sourceDiv = null; if (item.hasOwnProperty('method')) { sourceDiv = createElement('div', null, null, [cssClasses.source], resultObj.engine['type'] + ' . ' + item.method.toUpperCase()); } else { var sourceDiv = createElement('div', null, null, [cssClasses.source], resultObj.engine['type']); } var textWrapper = createElement('div', null, null, [cssClasses.text_wrapper]); textWrapper.appendChild(categoryDiv); textWrapper.appendChild(titleDiv); textWrapper.appendChild(sourceDiv); recItemWrapper.appendChild(imgWrapper); recItemWrapper.appendChild(textWrapper); recItemWrapperA.appendChild(recItemWrapper); recItem.appendChild(recItemWrapperA); widgetWrapper.appendChild(recItem); // hook up the click handler for this item // recItem.onclick = handleClick.bind(null, jxRecHelper, itemUrl + tracker_params, index); recItemWrapperA.onclick = handleClick.bind(null, jxRecHelper, itemUrl + tracker_params, index); }); } // end while var endDate = new Date(); var loadtime = (endDate.getTime() - startDate.getTime()); trackEventGa('AIML Article Recommendation', 'Content Loaded', 'algsrc='+algsrc+',site=LIFESTYLE,device=desktop,loadtime=' + loadtime) let domain = window.location.hostname; if(domain=='www.kompas.com'){ var url=window.location.href.split("/"); domain=url[2]+'/'+url[3] } let user_subs_type = "Gues"; let subs_type = ""; let is_lgn = 0; let engine = algsrc; if(getCookie('kmps_usrid')){is_lgn=1}; let time_load = loadtime; resolve(); /*** * JXRECSDK NOTES 3 of 5 - * pass all the info about the items to the rec helper * each one is an object: ALL MANDATORY * div * id * pos */ jxRecHelper.items(widgetItemArr); /*** * JXRECSDK NOTES 4 of 5 - * Call the ready() of the helper object when the recommendation * results have been populated to the widget * (This will register the action=ready event) */ if (resultObj.engine['type'] == 'api-1') { jxRecHelper.ready(resultObj.options.algo + ":" + resultObj.options.version); } else { jxRecHelper.ready(resultObj.engine['type']); } } else { jxRecHelper.error(204); console.error("Error: no recommendation items"); return; } } catch (err) { jxRecHelper.error(901); console.log(err.stack); let domain = window.location.hostname; if(domain=='www.kompas.com'){ var url=window.location.href.split("/"); domain=url[2]+'/'+url[3] } let user_subs_type = "Gues"; let subs_type = "" let is_lgn = 0; let engine = algsrc; if(getCookie('kmps_usrid')){is_lgn=1}; let endDate = new Date(); let time_load = (endDate.getTime() - startDate.getTime()); } }); } const _jxRecSdkURL = 'https://scripts.jixie.media/jxrecsdk.1.0.min.js'; var startDate = new Date(); class OneWidget { constructor() { //this is also the one we will pass to the JX rec helper object when //we instantiate it: //In this implementation most of these come from the options obj //on the publisher page. this._options = { accountid: '9262bf2590d558736cac4fff7978fcb1', pageurl: 'https://lifestyle.kompas.com/read/2022/08/15/095121420/berapa-lama-waktu-yang-kita-perlukan-untuk-jatuh-cinta', widget_id: '1000183-6xWeiWZFIM', type: 'pages', container: 'rekomendasi-konten-pilihan-untukmu-aiml', keywords: content_tags, title: title, customid: "20", count: 14, }; this._containerId = this._options.container; this._container = document.getElementById(this._containerId); this._engines = [{"url":"https:\/\/recommendation.jixie.media\/v1\/recommendation","method":"GET","pageurl":"https:\/\/lifestyle.kompas.com\/read\/2022\/08\/15\/095121420\/berapa-lama-waktu-yang-kita-perlukan-untuk-jatuh-cinta","system":"jx","type":"api-1","tracker_params":"?source=widgetML","tracker_algsrc":"V","count":14,"page_status":"read","excludeitemids":"20220815095121420"}]; } kickOff() { startDate = new Date(); const rand = Math.floor(Math.random() * 1000); /*const randSystem = Math.floor(Math.random() * 3); this._engine = this._engines[randSystem] if (location.hostname.indexOf('lestari') != -1) { this._engine = this._engines[1] }*/ this._engine = this._engines[0]; this._options.system = this._engine['system'] trackEventGa('AIML Article Recommendation', 'Widget load', 'algsrc=' + this._engine['tracker_algsrc'] + ',site=LIFESTYLE,device=desktop') let promJXSDK = fetchJSFileP(_jxRecSdkURL); let thisObj = this; // first we wait on the JX REC SDK to be loaded and initialized let recHelperObj = null; let recResults = null; promJXSDK .then(function() { /*** * JXRECSDK NOTES 1 of 5 - INSTANTIATION OF A JX REC HELPER OBJECT * Call this AFTER JX REC SDK is loaded but BEFORE you call your REC * backend. * * param: MANDATORY options object * options object must at a minimal have * accountid: get from jixie * widgetid: get from jixie * container: DIV ID of the destination div to house the widget * (for jixie widget this is just the options object passed from the page) * * (This will also register the action=load event) */ recHelperObj = jxRecMgr.createJxRecHelper(thisObj._options); let basicInfo = thisObj._options; basicInfo.engine = thisObj._engine if (basicInfo.engine.type == 'api-1') { var options = { count: basicInfo['count'], adpositions: "", keywords: basicInfo['keywords'], title: basicInfo['title'], date_published: "2022-08-15", pagecategory: "LIFESTYLE", algo: "mixed" }; if(getCookie('kmps_usrid')){ var kg = { pagetype:basicInfo.engine.page_status, uid:getCookie('kmps_usrid'), ukid:getCookie('kmp_uid') } if(basicInfo.engine.page_status=='read'){ kg['excludeitemids'] = basicInfo.engine.excludeitemids; kg['multiFormat'] = true; } options['additional'] = { kg:kg }; } return recHelperObj.getJxRecommendations(options); } else { return fetchRecommendationsP(basicInfo, recHelperObj.getJxUserInfo()); } }) .then(function(resp) { if (thisObj._engine.type == 'api-3') { recResults = new Object recResults.items = resp.docs.result; } else { recResults = resp; } recResults.engine = thisObj._engine; if (!resp || !recResults.items || recResults.items.length == 0) { /*** * JXRECSDK NOTES 2 of 5 - * Call the error() function on the recHelper when either an error * has occured in the fetching or there are no recommended items * * (This will register the action=error event) */ recHelperObj.error(204); throw "no recommendation results"; } }) .then(function() { // everything is ready (recommendation results, css): document.getElementById("rekomendasi-konten-pilihan-untukmu-aiml").classList.remove("-loading"); document.querySelector('.wSpec-list').remove(); createDisplay(rand, thisObj._container, recResults, recHelperObj) .then(function() { toggleDropdown(); //observe lozad lozad('.lozad', { load: function(el) { el.src = el.dataset.src; el.onload = function() { el.classList.add('fade') } } }).observe() }) }) .catch(function(error) { console.log(`Unable to create recommendations widget ${error.stack} ${error.message}`); }); } } var limit_gtm_ready = 1; function check_gtm_ready() { if ('ga' in window) { // create a new instance of our widget based on the options const newW = new OneWidget(); newW.kickOff(); } else { const timeout_gtm_ready = setTimeout(check_gtm_ready, 500) limit_gtm_ready += 1; if (limit_gtm_ready > 10) { clearTimeout(timeout_gtm_ready); const newW = new OneWidget(); newW.kickOff(); } } } check_gtm_ready() document.querySelector('.wSpec-secret').addEventListener('click', function(e) { e.preventDefault(); let wSl = document.querySelectorAll('.wSpec-source'); if (wSl.length > 0) { for (let i = 0; i < wSl.length; i++) { wSl[i].classList.toggle('show') } } }) function trackEventGa(category, action, label) { if ("ga" in window) { ga(function() { tracker = ga.getAll()[0]; if (tracker) { tracker.send("event", category, action, label); console.log('track event ', category, action, label) } }) } } function formBody(obj) { let formBody = []; for (var property in obj) { let encodedKey = encodeURIComponent(property); let encodedValue = encodeURIComponent(obj[property]); formBody.push(encodedKey + "=" + encodedValue); } return formBody.join("&"); } function getCookie(name) { var name = name + '='; var cookies = decodeURIComponent(document.cookie).split(';'); for (var i = 0; i < cookies.length; i++) { var c = cookies[i]; while (c.charAt(0) == ' ') { c = c.substring(1); } if (c.indexOf(name) == 0) { return c.substring(name.length, c.length); } } } function get_guid(url) { const videoPath = url.match(/\/watch\/(\d+)/); if (videoPath) { return `video.${videoPath[1]}`; } let arrayUrl = url.split('/'); let readPath = arrayUrl.indexOf('read'); if (arrayUrl[readPath + 1] == 'xml') { readPath += 1; } let year = arrayUrl[readPath + 1]; let month = arrayUrl[readPath + 2]; let date = arrayUrl[readPath + 3]; let id = arrayUrl[readPath + 4]; let guid = `.xml.${year}.${month}.${date}.${id}`; return guid; } function toggleDropdown() { let tdd = document.querySelectorAll('[data-dropdown]') if (!!tdd) { tdd.forEach((el) => { el.addEventListener('click', function() { el.parentElement.classList.toggle('-active') let saved = el.parentElement.getAttribute('data-saved') let kmps_usrid = getCookie('kmps_usrid'); if (kmps_usrid && !saved && el.parentElement.classList.contains('-active')) { let url = el.parentElement.getAttribute('data-url'); let guid = get_guid(url); check_bookmark( kmps_usrid, guid ).then(function(resp) { if (resp.hasOwnProperty('total_data')) { if (resp.total_data > 0) { el.parentElement.querySelector('.buttonBookmark').classList.add('-active'); el.parentElement.querySelector('.buttonBookmark').innerHTML = 'Hapus dari tersimpan'; el.parentElement.setAttribute('data-saved', 'true'); } else { el.parentElement.setAttribute('data-saved', 'false'); } } }) } }) document.addEventListener("click", function(e) { // console.log(e.target) if (el.contains(e.target)) { // console.log(tdd) } else { el.parentElement.classList.remove('-active') } }); }); } } function check_bookmark(kmps_usrid, guid) { let url = `https://api.kompas.com/2021/reaction/bookmark/list?kmps_usrid=${kmps_usrid}&guid=${guid}`; return new Promise(function(resolve, reject) { var xmlhttp = new XMLHttpRequest(); xmlhttp.onreadystatechange = function() { if (this.readyState == 4 && this.status == 200) { resolve(JSON.parse(this.responseText)) } }; xmlhttp.open("GET", url, true); xmlhttp.send(); }); } function do_bookmark(pageurl, pos, userFeedback) { const wSpecItem = document.querySelector(`.wSpec-item[data-index="${pos}"]`); const btnBookmark = wSpecItem.querySelector('.buttonBookmark'); const kmps_usrid = getCookie('kmps_usrid'); const guid = get_guid(pageurl); const type = pageurl.match(/\/watch\/(\d+)/) ? 'video' : 'article'; if (kmps_usrid) { if (btnBookmark.classList.contains('-active')) { set_unbookmark({ guid: guid, kmps_usrid: kmps_usrid, type: type }).then(function(resp) { btnBookmark.classList.remove('-active'); btnBookmark.innerHTML = 'Simpan artikel'; reactionToast('Artikel berhasil dihapus dari list yang disimpan'); userFeedback.event('un-save'); }).catch(function(resp) { // message: "Data doesn't exists" if (resp.hasOwnProperty('message') && resp.message.includes('exist')) { btnBookmark.classList.remove('-active'); btnBookmark.innerHTML = 'Simpan artikel'; reactionToast('Artikel berhasil dihapus dari list yang disimpan'); } }) } else { const user_bookmark_url = "https://activity.kompas.com/saved?order=desc"; set_bookmark({ guid: guid, kmps_usrid: kmps_usrid, type: type, publisher: 'kompas', platform: 'desktop' }).then(function(resp) { btnBookmark.classList.add('-active'); btnBookmark.innerHTML = 'Hapus dari tersimpan'; reactionToast('Artikel berhasil disimpan', user_bookmark_url); userFeedback.event('save'); }).catch(function(resp) { // message: "Data already exist" if (resp.hasOwnProperty('message') && resp.message.includes('exist')) { btnBookmark.classList.add('-active'); btnBookmark.innerHTML = 'Hapus dari tersimpan'; reactionToast('Artikel berhasil disimpan', user_bookmark_url); } }) } } else { const login_url = "https://account.kompas.com/login/a29tcGFz/" + btoa(window.location.href); window.location.href = login_url; } } function set_bookmark(data) { const url = "https://api.kompas.com/2021/reaction/bookmark/add"; return new Promise(function(resolve, reject) { const xmlhttp = new XMLHttpRequest(); xmlhttp.onreadystatechange = function() { if (this.readyState == 4 && this.status == 201) { resolve(JSON.parse(this.responseText)); } else if (this.readyState == 4 && this.status == 400) { reject(JSON.parse(this.responseText)); } }; xmlhttp.open("POST", url, true); xmlhttp.setRequestHeader("Content-Type", "application/x-www-form-urlencoded;charset=UTF-8"); xmlhttp.send(formBody(data)); }); } function set_unbookmark(data) { const url = "https://api.kompas.com/2021/reaction/bookmark/delete"; return new Promise(function(resolve, reject) { const xmlhttp = new XMLHttpRequest(); xmlhttp.onreadystatechange = function() { if (this.readyState == 4 && this.status == 200) { resolve(JSON.parse(this.responseText)); } else if (this.readyState == 4 && this.status == 400) { reject(JSON.parse(this.responseText)); } }; xmlhttp.open("POST", url, true); xmlhttp.setRequestHeader("Content-Type", "application/x-www-form-urlencoded;charset=UTF-8"); xmlhttp.send(formBody(data)); }); } class UserFeedback { constructor(engine, pageurl, jxRecHelper, pos) { this.engine = engine; this.pageurl = pageurl; this.jxRecHelper = jxRecHelper; this.pos = pos; } event(feedback) { if (this.engine == 'C') { const xmlhttp = new XMLHttpRequest(); let params = { domain: 'kompas.com', ce_userid: getCookie('kmps_usrid'), ce_sessionid: getCookie('ukid'), ce_pageurl: this.pageurl, engine: 'C', ce_feedback: feedback } xmlhttp.open("GET", 'https://apis.kgdata.dev/v1/aiml/feedback-widgetml' + formatParams(params)); xmlhttp.send(); } else if (this.engine == 'V') { if (feedback == 'share') { this.jxRecHelper.shared(this.pos); } else if (feedback == 'save') { this.jxRecHelper.bookmarked(this.pos); } else if (feedback == 'not-interested') { this.jxRecHelper.hidden(this.pos); } else if (feedback == 'un-not-interested') { this.jxRecHelper.unhidden(this.pos); } } } } function formatParams(params) { return "?" + Object .keys(params) .map(function(key) { return key + "=" + encodeURIComponent(params[key]) }) .join("&") } document.addEventListener("click", function(e){ let dx = document.querySelectorAll('[data-dropdown]') if(dx) { dx.forEach(function(el){ if(el.contains(e.target)) { el.parentElement.classList.toggle('-active') } else { el.parentElement.classList.remove('-active') } }) } })

Lihat Semua
  • TTS Eps 135: Serba Serbi Ramadhan
  • TTS - Jenis-jenis Keju
  • TTS - Tokoh-tokoh Berpengaruh di Dunia
  • TTS - Sambut Pemilu 2024
  • TTS - Eps 131 - Acakata: Hewan Melata!
  • Games Permainan Kata Bahasa Indonesia
  • TTS - Serba serbi Demokrasi
  • TTS Eps 130 - Tebak-tebakan Garing
  • TTS - Musik Yang Paling Mengguncang


Berapa Lama Waktu yang Kita Perlukan untuk Jatuh Cinta? (2024)
Top Articles
Latest Posts
Article information

Author: Msgr. Benton Quitzon

Last Updated:

Views: 6247

Rating: 4.2 / 5 (63 voted)

Reviews: 86% of readers found this page helpful

Author information

Name: Msgr. Benton Quitzon

Birthday: 2001-08-13

Address: 96487 Kris Cliff, Teresiafurt, WI 95201

Phone: +9418513585781

Job: Senior Designer

Hobby: Calligraphy, Rowing, Vacation, Geocaching, Web surfing, Electronics, Electronics

Introduction: My name is Msgr. Benton Quitzon, I am a comfortable, charming, thankful, happy, adventurous, handsome, precious person who loves writing and wants to share my knowledge and understanding with you.